How are you doing during Lockdown?
Day 46 of lockdown. I woke up quite cheerful. Why? I really don’t know, the same way I don’t know why yesterday afternoon I was sitting down in my carpet crying disconsolately. I think it was after day 35 when I started feeling not so good. Let’s put it in context. I have been the happiest person on earth since the government advised to stay at home. I saw this as my opportunity to do everything I always wanted to do; cook, read, read, nap, read and write. But the last few days I started feeling different. Doing things became more of an obligation, and when I didn’t do it, I was really hard on myself. I was thinking “this is a once in a life time opportunity to do what you really want to do” but, what is that? writing on my blog? writing a book? creating my own company for god’s knows what? I’m paralysed and spend the hours looking at the walls of my house. Then I was so overwhelmed about the fact I wasn’t feeling good that I just started crying. But I realised it’s ok, truly, and if something like this is happening to you, trust me, it’s ok. I think the fact that I can still enjoy the majority of the days, that I feel grateful all the time and that I have the capacity to sit down now and write this, means I am doing great. And all of us will have our downs (I would like more guys to come forward and let us know they can’t cope too, but that is a different conversation) but we will get up again.
For now I just promise myself to take one day at the time. Try to resolve the problems that I can solve now, but not to worry about what will come or how it will be. Because none of us can’t control what is to come, but we can control how we feel about today, and that is the best we can do. And that is ok.
And you, how are you coping with the lockdown?